I often wonder what might have been had Jesse James Hollywood understood what surrendering is really all about. I don’t mean the kind where you give up and raise the white flag. Exchange prisoners and turn to a civilian lifestyle after the bodies have been burned and the nightmares buried. I’m talking about accepting what life was like at the very moment of his gravest suffering. From all that I learned in researching this amazing story for both the movie Alpha Dog and my book Stolen Boy, all Jesse had to do was accept the fact that Ben Markowitz owed him money. Sure, Ben had spouted off and threatened Jesse. Yes, they’d had major ego-laden, volatile exchanges. And sure, Jesse was worried Ben might hurt one of his family members, but really, so what? Why couldn’t Jesse have just said – okay, the guy’s a punk, I’ve been punked, and now it’s time to move on.
There is an amazing amount of powerful energy behind someone who learns to do this. This is something we can all do. Look around us, and say, this ain’t so bad after all, is it? This is what is called accepting the moment as it is. Surrendering to what is. It may seem very passive, and non-energetic, but it is actually just the opposite. You see we are conduits to God’s energy, to the Supreme Truth, also known as consciousness. Consciousness is the energy of our creator. So, we are the hole in the flute, and what we do is ask the God energy to play us. Let’s not block the hole – let’s open it up to all that is.
Most of the God energy that swirls around us is wasted through negative thoughts, emotions, and actions. This is what the world of form is all about. We see it swirling around us at all times. And what we tend to do is use the negativity from thought and emotion to help us create in the world of form. And look where that gets us. Look at the shape the world is in right now. But what if we tried something different for a change? What if, when the thoughts and emotions frame a negative energy within us, we stop, and recognize it? Honor that, Yes, something is not going right here, so now we need to slow it down, and turn the energy into a positive form before we continue creating in the world of form?
And what if Jesse had done this, if he had realized, Yes, I’m really mad with what Ben had done. And, yes, there is this ball of hateful energy right here in my gut, but I’m not going to let it take me over. I’m not going to let the negative emotions usurp my ego and create hatred and negativity all around me. If Jesse had done this, then he would have stopped living in the past, which is something the ego just loves to do. It loves to color the present emotions with negativity from past thoughts and memories. And this is what happened with Jesse. And the same for Ben, if he had just stopped for a moment – something he couldn’t do because he was so messed up with drugs, alcohol and hatred at the time – then he would have been able to take control of himself, and forget about Jesse. Forget about this little ex friend of his who acted like he wanted to hurt him. And both these guys could have gone on with their lives, all their actions being sponsored by positive emotions and thoughts, which would lead to creating loving, positive happenings in their lives, rather than death to family, and death to self.
The bottom line they could never learn is this – present consciousness creates ultimate reality.
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